We meet Arielle Ford, author of The Soulmate Secret: Manifest the Love of Your Life with the Law of Attraction. Arielle met her husband, Brian, in extraordinary circumstances: she manifested him. It sounds new age and weird, but she’s extremely convincing on this matter… and she’s not some wooden-earringed, long-armpit-haired hippy, she’s an extremely successful publicist credited with launching the career of Deepak Chopra, among others. The basic idea of manifestation is that you put all your energies into imagining something, in a really positive way. Not “I want”, instead – in the case of love – thinking of all the love you DO have in your life, rather than the one love that you don’t.
13 years ago or so, Ariel decided that it was time to find her soulmate. She compiled a list in her head of all the things she wanted this person to have, then she visited the Hugging Saint in India. When she was hugging the saint, she said outloud what she was hoping for, the saint smiled, and after that Arielle started to have dreams about the person. One of which suggested that this person needed to let go of a person called Beth.
One month later, she flies to Portland with work. A friend of her colleague offers to pick her up (though never having met her), so she gets off the plane and is met by a man she has never met before, Brian. As soon as she sees him, she feels something very strongly. She suspects, just a little, that she’s going mad because she hears a voice which tells her that this is the man. She says nothing, the day rolls on, then later that day (where they are working hard on the booklaunch of another writer), Brian turns to her and says, “you know I have met you before”. It turns out that since Arielle had met the saint a month before, Brian had been having vivid dreams in which Arielle would appear. He also had a relationship with a woman called Elisabeth which he was stepping away from. Arielle and Brian were engaged 3 weeks later, and remain passionate about each other 12 years into their marriage.
It really is quite extraordinary to be around them. They exude a positive and all-encompassing energy which is almost intoxicating. I’m a bit of a sucker for all this kharma stuff – but even Mike is listening intently to their story. They talk very compellingly about attitudes (whether you like the manifestation and mysticism, the idea that people should strive to be happier in daily life is convincing), and it’s clear to see that the relationship that they have is very strong and healthy.
They are both high-powered individuals, in a very 21st century world, who have made time for individual and shared spirituality. I joked with them that we’d only find people like that in California, and they agree, but there is something about them that I do feel Mike and I can learn lots from. One of the things Dr John Gray talked about in his book is about how marriage has evolved and one of the struggles is that working women have to balance the masculinity required in the workplace with the feminity required in a relationship. And the same is true of men, they too need to find a way to augment their feminity to bond and understand their partners better.
These two have worked out that balance. Arielle is feisty and an achiever, but she takes time at the end of her day to purge that inner ball breaker (she calls it her “smiling and dialling” self). She takes a hot bath, pets a cat or goes for a short walk. Brian, equally, finds time to tune into his wife at the end of his day. He talks about preparing himself to listen and be there for her. Whatever they are doing is clearly working. Whether or not soulmates exist, the fact that both of these two believe that they have found their soulmates is the key to their success. They both put a lot of love and nurture into their relationship, and they are handsomely rewarded.
We are also rewarded because they make us a delicious dinner, and we happily watch the Emmys together.